Know that the stress response is the opposite of the relaxation response.

The human organism is programmed to react with the stress response or the ‘Fight, Fright or Freeze’ response. We are imprinted from birth by our environment to fear things that could potentially harm us and we are programmed to respond in certain ways. For example, if you suffer panic attacks at the thought of being in an elevator, you have a learned response to the thought of what has happened when you were in an elevator before. Your Mind-Body recalls an experience and your stress response can occur simply from the thought of an elevator.

Let’s look at panic attacks closely. Consider the Stress Response and the Relaxation Response as on a continuum; panic on one end and deep relaxation on the other.

When experiencing a panic attack, the amygdala (your internal “Houston, we have a problem”) sees, hears, feels, tastes, smells or thinks about something that triggers a stress response. A stress response is the release of epinephrine (adrenalin) and cortisol in your body. Your heart rate goes up, your mouth gets dry and blood is shunted from your gut (irritable bowel syndrome) and other non-essential bodily functions to your heart and large muscles so that you can Fight or Flight. When we were cavemen, this Fight or Flight response was extremely helpful when seeing a Saber-tooth tiger in your path. We don’t experience many interactions with Saber-tooth tigers anymore yet the Fight or Flight response remains the same in our bodies. (Our stress response also includes the Freeze response as fighting or fleeing our stress is rarely an option.) What it feels like in our bodies when having a panic attack is “I’m going to die” because that is what you were programmed to feel, to keep you safe. Rationally, you know that the elevator is safe. People all over the world take elevators every day and they are fine. “I must be crazy” is the next logical conclusion.

So let’s say you learn that there is an elevator experience coming up for you. There is an elevator at the airport and that is the only way to get to your rental car. Now you know that you have choice about what you think about and if you catch your thought about elevators before you have a significant stress response from it, you remember that the feeling in your body that you get with the thought of an elevator is a release of adrenalin and cortisol. You want to catch this thought early, before there is a significant stress response and trigger a relaxation response instead. Remember that the relaxation response is the opposite of the stress response. Both cannot be happening in your body at the same time. You cannot have a sympathetic and a parasympathetic response at the same time.

What triggers a relaxation response in you?

Consider times in your life when you experienced profound peace, joy, a sense of awe or overwhelming love. Think of how it felt in your body when you were in this experience. No judgment, no words, just a powerful sense of positivity. Think about situations where you are swept up in an experience. It would be helpful now to think back to the data you collected about yourself in the previous exercise. What are your strongest senses?

 

Do you have a strong sense of hearing? Does music take you away? Make you feel good? Quiet your mind? Does the sound of a wind chime bring you peace? Do you love the sound of wind or rain?

Do you have a strong sense of taste? Does the experience of a good meal, glass of wine, fresh fruit from a farmer’s market make you really happy?

Do you have a strong sense of touch? Do you love a good message, yoga class, or acupuncturist? Love to feel clay between your fingers on a pottery wheel? Does the feel of the wind on your face or the ocean water on your body calm your thoughts? Does stroking a beloved pet calm you down?

Do you have a strong sense of smell? Do aromatherapy candles put you at peace? Does the smell of bread baking or a turkey cooking make you feel happy?

Do you have a strong sense of sight? Love to take photographs? Watch a ballgame where you feel like you are in the game and swept away by the excitement? In awe of an Olympic athlete’s performance or someone on Dancing with the Stars?

Are you thoughts calmed by meditation or mindful walking, eating, crocheting, snowshoeing, playing golf, vacuuming, raking leaves, weeding, swimming, kayaking, hiking, jogging or praying?

 

Depending on how effective the experience is in creating a relaxation response for you is how helpful in can be as a strategy in balancing your body’s response to stress. During a relaxation response your body heals. Serotonin, melatonin, oxytocin, dopamine and endorphins are released. Your cells are bathed in an environment that feels healthy and that all is right with the world.

If you anticipate a stressful experience, use your own personal strategies and balance your response. When experiencing something that brings you joy, fully be there. Don’t feel guilty that you aren’t doing something else that you are ‘supposed’ to be doing. Know that this experience is therapy for you (and probably everyone else around you)…a strategy or intervention that will make you feel better and be healthier. Your cells will thank you for it. When giving a gift to someone else, consider what brings them peace and joy.